|
|
Worldliness -- Gossip Introduction: There are many passages warning us about "sins of the tongue." We are to watch what we say, how we say it, and to whom we say it, Psalm 39.1. There are many sins of the tongue listed in the Bible; lying, cursing, casual oaths, angry words, gossip, flattery, grumbling, complaining. All are sinful and need our attention but we want to primarily look at "angry words and gossip." This especially among our brethren in Christ. I) Misuse of the tongue A) Tongue is a danger to its owner and others 1. It is never fully tamed a. James 3.8 "no man can tame the tongue" we can never let down our guard for when we do is when we are likely to say something we should not. b. Illustration: Horse broke -- can't fully trust him, Psalm 32.9. c. Even the most mature Christians must work at watching what they say. 2. We will give account for every word we speak, Matthew 12.36-37 a. We had better watch what we say for others are listening to us. b. Things we say in a flippant manner may be taken seriously. 3. We can be guilty of what we accuse others of doing. b) We can sin with the tongue, Romans 1.29; Galatians 5.20; 2 Corinthians 12.20 II) What It Can Do A) Sin against a brother, Matthew 18.15-17 B) Slander someone, James 4.11-12, Proverbs 10.18;1 Peter 2.1 1. Slander is --"Accusing falsely... given to finding fault with the demeanor and conduct of others, and spreading their innuendos and criticisms in the church" (Vine, IV: 39). 2. One of the people in the Reagan Administration was accused of using his office for personal gain. He eventually won in court but he asked where he could go to get back his good name. C) Gossip/busybody, 1 Timothy 5.13 1. "To be working round about, instead of one's own business... to be meddling with, or bustling about, others people's matters... some who are not busied in their own business, but are over busied in that of others" (Vines) 2. Most do this either with malicious intent, or entertainment, or to feel important and a part of things, or out of habit. D) Backbiting, Romans 1.30; Proverbs 25.23; Psalms 15.3 III) The Effect It Can Have A) Destroy your neighbor, Proverbs 11.9 1. Destroy their reputation and potential influence they may have on others. 2. Cause personal pain and suffering, mental anguish B) Reveal secrets, Prov. 11.13; 20.19 1. Not everything you are told or learn is to be repeated. 2. Be careful of who you talk to for the other person may repeat what you have said. C) Sows strife & separates friends, Prov. 16.28; 17.9 1. Friendships are damaged because of one talking about the other. 2. Even after apologies are said the relationship is often damaged and the friendship is never the same. D) Destroy a church, Galatians 5.15 1. Destroy the unity of its members, people no longer trust each other, can talk to each other for fear that a private conversation will become public knowledge. 2. Destroys the reputation and influence of a congregation in the community or among other congregations. E) Like poison, James 3.8 F) Fire, James 3.6 IV) How To Prevent It A) Restraint 1. Wisdom is restraining one's lips, Prov. 10.19 2. Be sure you know of what you speak, Prov. 15.7 3. The heart of the wise teaches his mouth, Prov. 16.23 4. A smart person speaks sparingly, Prov. 17.27-28 5. You don't have to say all you want to say. Most of the time I have regretted what I have said and not what I have not said. B) Careful of what you say to and about others 1. What you tell may be confidential. Don't betray the confidence of another. 2. What you say could be taken differently than you intend. Others may "spin" what you say so choose your words wisely. 3. The faithful conceals a matter, Prov. 11.13 4. A fool says whatever they are thinking without thinking about what they are saying, Prov. 29.11 5. James 1.19 be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to wrath. 6. What you say may be repeated\quoted. C) Careful of how you choose your words 1. Make sure you convey what you want to say. 2. How? a. Use tact, Prov. 15.1 b. Think before you speak, Prov. 15.28; 12.18 c. Watch timing, Prov. 15.23 D) Careful of what you repeat 1. There are usually two sides to a story, Prov. 18.17 2. Don't jump to conclusions, Prov. 18.13 E) Give the benefit of the doubt 1. Benefit, 1 Cor. 13.7 a. "But it must mean, that in regard to the conduct of others, there is a disposition to put the best construction on it, to believe that they may be actuated by good motives, and that they intend no injury, and that there is a willingness to suppose, as far as can be, that what is done is done consistently with friendship, good feeling, and virtue" --Barnes b. "Is every ready to believe the best of every person, and will credit no evil of any but on the most positive evidence" -- Clarke 2. Proverbs 14.15 Do I have evidence? Is there another explanation? 3. Proverbs 18.13; Proverbs 29.10 Hasty words Conclusion: Everyone of us can work harder at being careful about: What we say, How we say it, and To whom we say it. (Adapted from Donnie Radar sermon)
|